Friday, September 07, 2007

THE TOP 75 CELEBRITIES WHOSE EXISTENCE SO OFFENDS ME THAT JUST LOOKING AT A PICTURE OF THEM MAKES ME WANT TO COMMIT RANDOM ACTS OF VIOLENCEā„¢

#54: Woody Harrelson

Every time I look at a picture of Woody Harrelson I feel like kicking someone in the stomach. There. I've admitted to it. I just can't help but start thinking about the resemblance between him and Matthew McConaughey (you might recall him as #59 on this list) and then I really start revvin' up. Two dirty hippies that look almost exactly the same and are celebrities? Where's my sledgehammer?

But Woody's got an anti-charm all his own: the slack-jawed old-man drooling, the "I'm CRAZY, man, CAH-RAY-ZEE!" faux-intensity, and of course, there's White Men Can't Jump.

So is it just me who looks at a picture of Woody Harrelson and immediately feels an uncontrollable urge to unload a shotgun into a platter full of hash brownies?

Well, is it?!!?

1 Comments:

Blogger Gene K. said...

Baby, why you gots to be a hemp-hater?

10:33 AM  

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