Friday, May 02, 2008

THE TOP 75 CELEBRITIES WHOSE EXISTENCE SO OFFENDS ME THAT JUST LOOKING AT A PICTURE OF THEM MAKES ME WANT TO COMMIT RANDOM ACTS OF VIOLENCE™

#30: Ryan Phillippe


While I'm on the subject of celebrity Ryans who give me the heebie-jeebies, how about that Ryan Phillippe guy, huh? Not only does he look like somebody who you should keep away from small children but he has so many double consonants in his name that nobody knows how to fucking pronounce it right. Is it "FILL-ip"? "Fill-i-PEE"? "Fill-EE-pey"? Who knows! But what I do know is that whenever I look at a picture of him and his spray-on blond five o'clock shadow I feel like hitting myself in the head with one of those giant wiffle ball bats at least thirty five times in a row then trying to walk out into oncoming traffic. And is that so wrong?

1 Comments:

Anonymous "a" said...

That is so wrong! Ryan Phillippe isn't worth an oncoming traffic stunt! He's more of a hiding live mealworms in everyone's Moons Over My Hammy® at Denny's kinda guy.

10:10 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home