Saturday, December 30, 2006

ENTERTAINMENT DROPPINGS: The Living Embodiment of Albert Camus' "The Myth of Sisyphus" (Chapter One) Appears On

Somewhere, a dead Algerian-French Existentialist philosopher is smiling. For indeed, I was originally planning for this post to merely inform you about the multiple absurdities discovered in an article on detailing the specifics of George Lucas' upcoming Grand marshalling of the Rose Bowl Parade in Pasadena on Monday -- everything from the inclusion of fans marching as stormtroopers, to the twin planets of LucasSuckness Endor* and Naboo re-created as floats, to the marching band touting their interpretations of Star Wars music "with a Louisiana twist".

But then, what should catch my eye on this very same web page, but the banner ad which I have reproduced for you immediately to the right of these words? Yes, the producers of Superman Returns would like to offer the fruits of their labor to the Academy for their consideration as a candidate for Best Picture.

No, that's not a typo, and you didn't misread it: someone actually thinks the words "Superman Returns" and "Best Picture" belong in the same sentence.

This is the movie where a single stick of Kryptonite almost kills Superman/Jesus but a whole island made out of Kryptonite just makes him grunt a little. The movie where "intrepid reporter" Lois Lane is so smart she brings her kid along to help investigate Lex Luthor's private yacht. And it's the movie where Superman/Jesus has an asthmatic, learning-disabled five year-old son who can pick up a piano and throw it at a guy but can't help his own mother break the lock on a door so they can escape because he's so f*cking stupid.

So thank you, Jon Peters, Brian Singer and Gilbert Adler, for the astronomical amount of absurdity you have foisted upon my day.

* Yes, dorks, I know Endor is actually a moon. So shut up before I open up a "jar jar" of whoop-ass on you.


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