FIERCEFILE™: Recap Of The Recap

And here we are at the Cycle 7 recap show already! Boy, it seems like only yesterday we were wallowing in ennui after realizing this cycle wasn't gonna be all that, and now here we are celebrating what's happened so far. With only five weeks to go, we were treated to a stroll down memory lane and enough bonus footage to make you wonder "How many other scenarios did they concoct and realize they weren't quite interesting enough to include?"

By far the best too-hot-for-TV moment was Monique's tirade in the kitchen upon the discovery that someone ate her chips. Having realized her precious snack food had been devoured by one of her housemates (my money's on Anchal), Monique decided that if she couldn't have chips, no one would have chips, and proceeded to crush every bag of chips in the house with her feet. This prompted the following exchange between Monique and one of the twins:

ONE OF THE TWINS: I don't understand, why would you take away everyone's chips if we're all sharing anyway?

MONIQUE: Where my Doritos® at?!?

(Okay, that might just be paraphrasing, but Monique did make sure to scream the word "Doritos®" in order to fulfill the product placement contract. Altho why any company would want their product associated with a psychotic episode is beyond me.)

Next we had the never-before-seen footage of the models freaking out when a tiny bird flew into the Top Model House. As far as I can tell, one of the crew probably tossed the bird into the house and Jay Manuel probably shouted "All right girls, time to get crazy!" and then everyone started screaming like they were in a Hitchcock film. But really all this particular situation seemed to generate footage-wise was a "desperate" Anchal crawling on all fours in a slip, which they made sure to show three times.

Other than that we got footage of Megg crying at the crazy-wig photoshoot and trying to vent her frustrations by playing her "ghetto bongos," which merely served as a reminder of why I hated Megg so much and how relieved I was when they finally got rid of her.

There wasn't much else of note, and since my Powerbook is making some really strange noises, I'll make this mercifully short.